Chapter 51 - 51. Shopping Battle
\'Well since he asked I might as well let him have it\' Asher decided this and put on his best smile. "This is a special from where we ate. It even comes with a milkshake!" Art folded up the permission slip and grabbed the bag.
"You guys are the best. I started to talk way too much with mom and completely missed my chance to eat in their work cafeteria." He had been starving and immediately took a bote of the five alarm taco.
\'Here it comes...Are we terrible friends?\' Jane felt the impending doom abut to hit them now that Art had taken such a large bite.
His face shifted through a few emotions as he looked at the gaze of Asher and Jane\'s turned head. The silence was eating at the two of them while they waited for the inevitable bomb to go off. When Art took a second bite of the taco they knew that something was seriously wrong. "This is great! It has just the right amount of spice and balance. I can see why it is paired with a milkshake. I am sure the creaminess cuts right through the heat."
Asher and Jane were both dumbfounded at Art\'s immunity to the spicy fire that had tormented them. "That\'s it!? You are fine?"
"No way you can\'t feel the heat. That is the five alarm taco that literally melted out mouths." Asher and Jane were trying to find out why he was not reacting or even getting red faced.
"Eh, five alarm? I would say this is like two alarm…" Art just took another big bite then looked at the two curiously.
"He must have gotten a dud. No way he is fine." Jane did not believe for a second that Art was immune to the spice in the taco.
"But I can smell it, it burns my nose…" Asher wanted to think the same but there were too many facts. \'It looks the same. It smells the same. But he isn\'t even flinching.\'
"You know I should make you guys some real spicy tacos some time. I have a recipe that uses those ghost peppers from down south. They say they are as hit as the sun at noon. So it pretty much melts the asphalt making up the roads." Art looked like he was dreaming and excited about these peppers.
"You want something spicier?" Jane raised her hands and let them fall in defeat. "You are insane…" She gave up that second trying to ever prank Art with spicy food again.
With Their small bit of trickery doused by Art\'s surprising immunity to spicy food, the trio set their sights on the next stop. The grocery store. Art had a list memorized and written down. He also knew that Asher had his own list so the real question was, who would finish getting their supplies first.
"Jane, we would like to elect you our official judge. We will trust you to give a just decision of the winner." Art turned to Jane with these words and an extremely serious face.
"Please be as impartial as possible. When I defeat Art in this battle for glory I will only feel completed if it is unbiased and fair." Asher started up too leaving Jane just as confused as when Art spoke.
The two looked at each other and started to step in to the store they had chosen. "It\'s on!" They yelled and were off with a cart in their hands. The wheels spun as they pushed down the isles after their ingredients. Asher was barreling toward the produce aisle looking for green onions and potatoes.
Art had taken a different route and was in the middle of the coffee aisle. Asher did not spare a moment to think about why his competition was grabbing coffee if he was making a chocolate cake. Instead he counted his lucky stars that Art looked to be grinding his coffee beans himself.
The Produce was so perfectly stacked but Asher could not stop to grab the top apples. He made the split decision to grab from the bottom of the stack. This fatal mistake caused a tremor through the entire stack. Before Asher knew what hit him there was a mountain of apples rolling around on the floor. Art had been sneakily coming up behind him after grabbing his coffee and been caught in this mess.
"This is a trap! I just need to get to those strawberries!" Art\'s voice was cut off by the rolling apples knocking him off balance. Asher managed to escape and get in to the aisle with all the fresh baked bread. He needed an entire loaf of french bread but the more he searched the less he found.
They can\'t be out of it now…\' He looked frantically toward the bakery where he knew the bakers would always be hard at work and spotted the baker pulling out a fresh sheet pan of french bread. There was no hesitation as he pushed the cart with all his might and came to a skidding halt in front of the counter. "Miss, can I please have one of those french breads?"
Asher used his most polite tone and really turned on the charm, however as the woman went to respond that she needed to get a bag Asher saw that Art was [passing him on the way to the flour. \'He already escaped the apples? How fast is he?\'
"Ha-Ha! You will never beat me Asher. If there is one thing my grandmother taught me it was to efficiently get through a grocery store!" Art was in cloud nine knowing that he only had a few things left to get.
\'Is that really something to brag about?\' Asher wasn\'t sure if he was supposed to be intimidated or impressed by this at all. Instead it felt kind of nerdy. "Here is your fresh hot french bread, Thank you for your patience," Asher had the hot bread in his hand and was already in the move.
\'Egg noodles, egg noodles, where are you egg noodles?\' He sprinted through the pasta aisle missing the egg noodles twice before he saw them in the very bottom shelf. He grabbed the cheapest brand and was moving again. "Can\'t decide on what one to use huh?"
He sent his taunt out to Art who was holding two different bags of chocolate in his hands. He had no idea on what one t sue to make his chocolate move filling. "This is an art form here Asher, if I get one with too much cocoa butter in it the mousse might separate." It looked like Art was willing to lose time over this so Asher took full advantage and hunted down the canned tomato sauce.
The worst was about to happen though, in front of him a fallen wet floor sign was not doing its job and warning of the slippery floor ahead of him. When the wheels of his cart hit it Asher was dragged in to a sideways drift. His turn was failing but the feeling of the drift was exhilarating. \'Well if I die now i guess I will at the very least know what a race car driver feels like.\'
The drift seemed deadly and Jane held her breath seeing this from the entrance. She knew that her friends were acting like children but she still felt that she was interested to see who would finish first. Seeing that Asher managed to save himself and the cart she sent a silent cheer for him to the heavens. He managed to grab the canned tomatoes and get in to line easily.
\'This line is too long.\' Asher immediately had this thought but after searching around he noticed one factor which would be his perfect win no matter what. \'There is only one cashier and I am in the line first.\' He was already reveling in his victory. The line moved slowly and Asher began to feel a growing worry since he still did not see Art behind him. \' Don\'t tell me Art got lost?\'
Asher managed to get through the line and have everything bagged up for the trip home. He was still feeling high in his feeling of victory when his face dropped as he saw who was standing next to Jane at the exit. "Bro, why did you wait in line when the self checkout was open?"
These words trampled Asher\'s poor heart. \'The self check out! How could I forget?!\' Asher could cry at his ignorance in this race, He had not lost because of his speed but because he had given up such a small mistake. "I\'m a good guy so I won\'t make you carry my bags as the loser." The smug smile on Art\'s face made Asher want a rematch immediately, but they would just end up wasting food if they shopped again.
"I will get you next time. Just you wait." Asher raised his fist and made the angriest face her could, making them all laugh in turn.