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Chapter 290 - Mourning Etiquette

As soon as I return to Alexander\'s chambers, I collapse on a sofa and call for Kate.

I\'ve been far from my daughter for a couple of hours. Has she missed me? Did she cry too much?

When Kate walks in, the little ball is sleeping. She\'s not even hungry, judging from her peaceful expression. I fed her before going out, so she should be fine for an hour or so.

?How has she been?? I inquire.

Lavinia is pretty annoying when she cries. Her voice is high-pitched and hits in the head. I can\'t stand to listen to her cry for too long...

?She fell asleep a few minutes ago,? Kate says.

Only?

?What has she done for the two hours I was away?? She didn\'t torture my handmaid, did she?

?She stared at me with her eyes wide,? Kate confesses. ?She barely blinked.?

Oh.

?No cries or tantrums??

?It\'s the calmest kid ever, Theodora,? Kate replies with a chuckle. ?From what I\'ve heard, your husband was also like this as a baby.?

My child isn\'t like him, is she? I wouldn\'t enjoy knowing that she has memories from the past. It would mean that her life will be led by events that never happened...

But it would also mean that she will remember if I say something she doesn\'t like.

?I don\'t mean anything bad when I say little ball,? I whisper to her.

Oh, she\'s sleeping so peacefully. She\'s become a little cute now.

Also, Kate has tied a ribbon on her forehead... She reminds me a little of my brother as a baby.

Kate brings Lavinia to the cradle and settles her there while a maid knocks on the door. It seems that few have permission to come in here without knocking.

?Your highness, there\'s a message from the Palace,? she says.

?Tell me,? I sigh.

?Her majesty, the Dowager Empress, passed away.?

?You mean, the Empress Grandmother,? I point out.

?Yes, your highness. The Empire will have three days of mourning before the official funerals.?

?Who sent this message?? I inquire.

?It\'s from the imperial offices.?

Not from the Empress\'s building.?

?All right, you can go.?

As soon as he gets out, I lean back on the sofa and cross my arms.

I\'m sorry for the Empress. I didn\'t know her very well, but she was kind to me. She told me of her secret and entrusted me with her paintings.

I\'ve never had a grandmother, so she\'s the closest to one for me.

?At least, she saw her first great-grandchild,? Kate comments, checking for one more time that Lavinia is sleeping. ?Death is a blessing for crazy people...?

?Please,? I murmur.

?Sorry, I didn\'t know you grew so attached to her.?

?She was kind, in her own way,? I say, not finding any better argument.

Why am I this sad? But most of all, is the timing by chance?

Did the harpy succeed this time? Did she poison her?

?I have to go there,? I say. I have to check whether it was all natural.

?The Empress Grandmother had a good age,? Kate reminds me.

It\'s not strange that she left us, true. But her words last time, how she decided to let me have her possessions... She knew that something would happen, or was it all by chance?

Did she feel the breath of death or the threat of another Empress nervous about her position?

What if the Dowager Empress poisoned the Empress Grandmother when she heard that I visited her a couple of times?

?I will be back,? I say, getting up. ?Look after Lavinia for an hour more.?

I\'m followed by a single maid while seeping into the building. The Empress Grandmother\'s servants are all gloomy and tired, yet still running from one side to the other.

The butler notices me and stops his run.

?Your highness,? he says, surprised. ?What are you doing here??

?I wanted to check if the news that came from the Palace is as ominous as they told me,? I sigh. ?Is her majesty really...?

I can\'t finish the sentence because my voice disappears. Am I so touched by that woman\'s disappearance?

?Unfortunately, it\'s true. Her majesty felt ill the last few days, but she didn\'t want to alarm the Palace and kept quiet. Her majesty decided to leave us in silence, the way she lived for years.?

I nod, my lips curling down against my will.

?I didn\'t know... She seemed all right when I last visited.?

?Her majesty was elated to see the little Princess,? he comments.

?My daughter is no princess,? I point out.

?Oh,? he murmurs. ?That... I\'m sorry, I\'ve made a mistake.?

He bows his head and stiffens his muscles, worried about my reaction.

?Has anyone else visited?? Maybe, the Princess. That might be the cause of such a misspell.

A butler doesn\'t just invent titles out of thin air.

?No, your highness. You\'re the only one, apart from casual visits from his highness, the Archduke.?

?I understand,? I murmur.

At least, Alexander seems to have understood the importance of keeping in contact with his elders in time. He might have regretted it if he didn\'t visit her even once. Especially now that she\'s gone.

?Do you need anything, your highness?? the butler inquires, noticing my lost expression.

Half of me was considering this whole situation; the other half was sighing with sadness. Who knows which one he saw?

?No, I just wanted to confirm the news and check if her majesty left our world due to natural causes.?

?I can\'t say, your highness, I am no expert. But there is nothing that makes us think it\'s not the case. After years of living like this, we would have noticed...?

We must refer to the servants. The few that stayed loyal to an apparently crazy woman. They protected her for so long that there is not such a big chance that she was poisoned.

?I\'ll go back,? I murmur. ?Will his majesty deliver a speech during the funerals??

?I do not know.?

I will write one for him. There\'s no way he doesn\'t honour the woman that brought him to the throne!

?Her majesty was happy during her last days of life, your highness,? the man adds. ?She told me to let you know that there are times when it\'s better to stay silent and wait. She wouldn\'t like it if anything were to happen to you after her death, so she asks you to avoid making your friendship public. She was content enough that you kept visiting.?

?I won\'t let them notice, don\'t worry.?

?Also, it\'s better if you leave the place using the servants\' corridors. There are many eyes pointed at here. There will be even more now that the news is spreading. We will deliver her majesty\'s legacy once the waters settle.?

?I didn\'t come here for that,? I point out. ?Isn\'t there anything members of her family ought to do? Don\'t let them run away from responsibilities.?

?It won\'t happen, your highness. His majesty will be present at the funerals, and the whole royal family will be wearing mourning clothes. It\'s an official event concerning the whole Empire. There will be no parties for three days; folkmen won\'t be allowed to sing and dance for that time.?

?Mourning clothes? Is black the colour here in Ethiro?? I ask him.

?Yes, it is,? he replies. ?But your highness isn\'t required to follow etiquette. Your highness just had a daughter: it wouldn\'t be odd to wear ordinary clothes.?

?I prefer not to attract attention,? I cut it short. ?I\'ll wear dark clothes at least for the mourning time.?

?As you wish, your highness.? That said, he returns to the duties of a servant whose lord just died.

I understand whom Alexander inherited his capability to choose his people from. The servants know exactly how to move and what to do to make sure her last will is fulfilled. There isn\'t anyone guiding them, which makes me believe she organised her funeral while still alive.

I use the servants\' corridors, wondering whether the Empress Grandmother knew how I explored the passages last year.

Once returned to Alexander\'s room, I call for the maids and ask them to find all the dresses black in colour in my closet. I also open Alexander\'s wardrobe and look for an outfit for him.

The only one I find is too decorated for the funerals.

?Change the golden buttons with some made of obsidian or onyx.?

The only colours admitted will be those of the military decorations for men and a few discreet and simple jewels for women.

When Lavinia wakes up and requests her meal, I\'m in the middle of work. I pick her up and cuddle her for a minute while reaching the armchair. I prefer to sit comfortably while feeding her.

?Hey, little ball,? I murmur. ?Your mother will be away for some time in a few days. Don\'t worry, though. I will always come back...?