BXBX NOVEL Chapter 99 - Deja Vu
It was as firm as she imagined while peeking at him on the beach. She had caught a couple of glances on him, and she had tried glaring to discourage those women from eating Nate with their eyes. But it was to no avail because she was wearing sunglasses. Thankfully, because it would have been a little embarrassing if Nate saw her in that state.
«This should help reduce the temperature, and you'll be like new tomorrow morning,» she said.
Her voice had calmed down, and she was just assessing the situation. Her fingers had stopped doing anything useful, and they just trailed down on his back, following an instinct she didn't know she had.
Her stomach turned on itself while a feeling of deja vu unsettled her. She had done something like that already, right? Her lips started tingling, and she almost bowed forward to peck the base of his neck. That was something she was pretty sure she had done, as well.
She stopped just in time. First, because she returned back to reality. And then, because that peck might have hurt Nate's sensitive skin.
«Sorry,» she sighed. «I shouldn't have talked like this...»
She couldn't stop while in the heat of the moment, but after her words were over, she realised how much she had overstepped her boundaries.
«You're right, Lara,» Nate murmured, turning to her and looking her in the eye.
His cheeks and nose were pinkish, and she instinctively reached out to him. She rubbed her oily fingers on his face.
Even though, she realised, he was so handsome with a red face. She would have looked at him forever if only she could.
She shook her head, cursing at herself. Those red cheeks and nose were most likely hurting! How could she allow her desires to blind her like that?
«I am too stubborn for my own good,» Nate continued, catching her trembling fingers and bringing her hands to his lips. He pecked the back of her hands, first one and then the other. All while looking her in the eye.
Lara couldn't move away, for his eyes were so magnetic and her heart acting strange. She stood still, accepting everything as if it was a normal occurrence.
«Thank you for taking care of me,» Nate whispered, leaning his cheek on her joint hands.
He closed his eyes, grateful for that contact. His instincts were yelling at him, telling him to grab her at that very moment and never let go.
But he couldn't bring himself to break the trust she was having. She allowed him to hold her hands, and she wasn't backing away. If he made the wrong move, he risked frightening her. Or worse, she could push him away in hatred and repulse.
It was better to wait. Even if he had to spend the rest of his life holding back, he was ready for that.
What a mighty Alpha he was! So obedient and smitten in front of his human mate. If anyone from his pack saw him at that moment, his reputation would have been ruined forever. But he didn't care; nothing was too high of a cost if he could stay next to Lara.
He glanced at her, his eyes filled with tenderness. He was taken back when he noticed her trembling lower lip.
«Am I frightening you?» he asked. «Are you scared of me, Lara?»
She blinked, waking up from her daze. She retreated her hands and straightened her back. What was that warm feeling deep in her belly?
It wasn't as new. Not as much to unsettle her like the first time. But it was powerful, and to some degree... pleasing.
«What... What did you say, sorry?» she mumbled, collecting all her thoughts and trying to make any sense of their conversation.
Was there a conversation to begin with?
«I don't want you to be scared of me,» he repeated. «If I've done anything to make you feel like I have ill intentions, please allow me to talk things out.»
He was oddly rational in her eyes. Even if red, his face was solemn. His eyes were firm and as blue as the sea out the window.
«Why do you think so?» she said. «I don't feel threatened. At all. If anything, I'm... Uhm, I feel safe next to you, Nate.»
And it was the truth. She hadn't been so comfortable in a long while. Something as trivial as a family vacation wasn't an option with her unresting cubs. They would growl at strangers before; their eyes could glow for no reason at all...
But since the moment she met Nate, they had learnt a lot about controlling themselves. Just a few words from him were enough, for he knew exactly how they felt and what they needed.
In just a few days, he had changed her life yet once again.
«Thank you for being here, Nate. For being a father to our kids, and everything else... If you are with them, it doesn't matter anymore if I fail. It makes things easier, really.»
He sat straight, clenching his fists on his lap not to reach out to her again. She had just stopped trembling and smiled at him, so he needed to refrain from breaking that feeble balance between them.
She didn't look scared anymore, and it should have been enough for him. At least for the moment being.
«I don't want to be there for them only,» he said. «I want to be their father and share your burden. And I want to be there for you, Lara.»
She avoided his gaze. Oddly, that gave him enough courage to continue talking. Without her eyes on him, he had fewer distractions.
«I won't ask you to accept me just yet. And I won't ask anything in return. All I need is a chance to prove to you that I can be part of your family. Is that too much to ask?»
As she shook her head in denial, silently allowing him to continue with his courting, his heart returned beating after a long, long moment.