40-Episode 37: To See The Front
\'Yeah, it\'s me.\'
His voice sounded exactly the same as it did a month and a half ago. Strong, thick, and full of dignity, it was none other than that of Gourin Motomune, Kunihiro Ryuzaki\'s great friend. The golden energy rising from his entire body showed that he too had overcome several hardships and moved into Phase 2.
Ryuzaki wanted to cheer, and he also wanted to cry. There was a lot of talk, and frankly, there was even resentment; if it had been a month ago, Ryuzaki would have said it easily.
The heads of the hydra reveal their wariness in front of the sudden intruder. The five remaining heads chirp and stick out their tongues as they pull back into the fog to get some distance.
Ryuzaki puts all the emotions that are boiling up on the shelf and regroups himself. He looked at Goubayashi, and then at Zeku\'s body as he lay on the deck. He wondered how long Ouga\'s strength would last. As far as the note Serena left him, it was safe to assume he had some leeway. But even so, I can\'t let her roll around here all the time.
\'\'Uozumi, is your sister okay?\'\'
No. Trousseau is losing it.
\'\'Well, the white horse can\'t move now either...\'\'
What Ryuzaki is concerned about is the fact that there are no recovery magic users here. In the face of a strong enemy, this one is forced to be jittery.
I\'m not sure if it\'s a good idea, but I think it\'s a good idea.
\'Sorry to keep you waiting, gentlemen, you\'re looking for me.
A pretentious voice is heard, and a black cat in boots appears on deck.
It\'s Nekomiya Miya of the Ket Sea. Behind her, from the shadows of the cabin, Thunderbird\'s Kaminari Totoha popped up from the shadows of the cabin.
\'\'Nekomiya, are you alright?\'\'
\'\'Kannari got mad at me. He told me to think about what I could do for Washio if I had time to blame myself.
At Ryuzaki\'s question, Nekomiya shrugged his shoulders. Goubayashi frowned at the change in air for a moment, but didn\'t say anything.
\'Well, it\'s a common sophistry. But there\'s no way I won\'t make a move at the behest of a scared Kannari. Right?\'\'
He\'s still a pain in the ass. But I\'m grateful that he\'s moving.
"Nekomiya, take care of the recovery magic. Our first priority is Zeku.
Where\'s the chairman? I\'m covered in blood, though?
I\'ll hold on. Goubayash, you\'ll have to work fast and easy on this one.
It\'s fine. I\'ll come back for it.
Goubayashi, with his arms crossed, does not move slightly, but the energy rising from his body is still gaining momentum.
\'You\'ve grown up, Ryuzaki.
I was tempted to utter an embarrassment, "You mean the body, right?
\'It\'s coming!\'
Kenzaki shouted, and at the same time, four of Hydra\'s heads rushed towards us at once.
\'Kagoi and Kenzaki, Okumura and Uozumi, one each!
Ryuzaki gave a quick instruction and bites furiously at the one head that lunged at him. Goubayashi did the same, catching one of the heads with both arms. Goubayashi instructs the goblins and prepares for a surprise attack by the last one.
Immediately after that, Ryuzaki saw Goubayashi, right beside him, move into a ridiculous motion.
\'\'Haaah........----!
With his log-like arms, Govayashi held one head down with one hand and let the golden energy rising from his entire body converge into his free other arm. The right arm, with its energy compressed, radiated like the sun. On the deck of the heavy branch school, which was covered in fog, it burned his vision extraordinarily strongly.
\'\'Hmph!
The moment he slammed his right arm down, the energy exploded. The Hydra\'s head, which Goubayashi was in charge of, was easily erased just as its fist touched or not, and the impact shook the heavy duty branch school. The aftermath of the explosion hit the other heads, and naturally, Ryuzaki\'s body stepped on the tatara as well.
\'If the men meet for three days, scrape and see\' is one of Goubayashi\'s mottos. As his friend, Ryuzaki had grown up to live up to this motto, and it seemed the same was true for Goubayasi.
Can we lose?
Ryuuzaki dug both claws into Hydra\'s neck and slammed the breath into it from close range. He caught the head burning and writhing in agony with his great jaws and chewed it up.
Goubayashi turned to cover the struggling Okumura and Uozumi. He kneaded his golden fighting spirit and kicked Hydra\'s head, which the two of them tried hard to hold down, and crushed it. At about the same time, Kenzaki cut off one of the heads with his vaunted one-slash.
There\'s one left. Ryuzaki glares through the fog, but the canyon is eerily silent. A sly, sly, crawling sound could be heard from the starboard side of the heavy branch, and at the same time, the head of the hydra thrown on the deck fell as if it were being pulled.
\'Looks like she\'s trying to escape,\'
Nekomiya muttered with pinned ears.
\'In the direction of the path?\'
It\'s okay. There doesn\'t seem to be anything out there.
All right. Five-minute riverbed!
Ryuzaki shouted while healing his wounds with Nekomiya\'s Shadow Spinning (Shadow Heel) as he rushed over to him.
\'\'Oh!\'\'
Tell Kurumori. Agency\'s largest, through this canyon at once!
I\'m sorry, Mr. Chairman!
Taking a gesture that resembled a salute with a peep, Gokugawara ran away from the deck.
Ryuzaki deactivated the 《Full Dragonization》 and checked his own wounds once again. Part of his scales were peeling off and blood was flowing lazily. But, well, injuries like this are usual. It wasn\'t that it didn\'t hurt, but there were many more important things to do right now. And the wounds are being healed by Nekomiya right now.
Ryuzaki looked at Goubayashi. It wasn\'t just Ryuzaki. Kenzaki, Okumura and the others, as well as Zeku, are all staring at the returning man.
\'\'A lot of things have happened, haven\'t they?
Goubayashi said.
\'Yeah, it\'s been a lot of fun and a lot of sadness,\'
Well....
Crossing his arms, Goubayashi nodded quietly. Kenzaki asked fearfully as he put his sword away.
\'\'Goubayasi, Kaoruko...?\'\'
\'Yeah, there\'s a lot to talk about, including that one. Let\'s get the information straight for once.
Well, Washio....
When Goubayasi heard this story, he closed his eyes first and prayed silently. It was impossible to know what kind of emotions were behind that expression.
The news of Goubayashi\'s return was like gospel to the class that had been stifled by Washio\'s death. Nekomiya and Kannari, who had mentioned the news to the students, told them about his activities on the deck, and it can be said that some of the students, who were scared to death, had their hearts greatly suppressed.
Some students had come to watch the exchange of information with Goubayashi that took place in the cafeteria.
There were a lot of things that had to be communicated to Goubayashi from here. Washio\'s death wasn\'t the only thing we had to tell Gowbayashi. We had to tell them about Koganei\'s kidnapping and his contact with the humans. What kind of thoughts the class was having, what they were starting to think, and how they were being shaken up.
The only thing that Goubayasi, who has been listening intently, interjects is about the Red Winged Demon.
Goubayashi and Kaoruko had engaged in several battles with a monster called Akahane, and had been chasing it. Apparently, as the story progresses, they come to the conclusion that the Akahane is a pawn of the Red Moon blood race (Red Moon).
When he heard that it was only a pawn, that the Knight and the Bishop had already been identified, and that Washio had been killed by the Bishop, even Gowabayashi\'s eyes widened in astonishment.
Yes, speaking of classmates\' interests, it was Kaoruko.
What happened to Kaoruko, who was supposed to have been traveling with Goubayasi?
\'We got separated. Or rather, I let him get away during an engagement with Akahane.
Goubayashi, who had been severely injured by the pawn, had been hidden and recuperated by the human knights for the next ten days, so he hadn\'t been able to see Kaoruko.
\'According to Utsurogi and Rin, the only person trapped by Red Moon is Koganei.
\'He was confronting his own inner self, just like me, and gaining new powers. He shouldn\'t have been so caught if he\'d just run away.
It was too optimistic an observation, but it would be much better to do so than to grieve based on the current, uncertain information.
Goubayashi and Kaoruko had discussed in advance the path they would take if they were separated. Kaoruko was supposed to use her Phase 2 ability to get the little demons (Imps) and other monsters on her side and head east.
\'\'Yes, Goubayashi,\'\'
Just as the conversation was winding down, Ryuzaki said this.
\'\'Hm?\'\'
Goubayashi looks up as he sips herbal tea from the teacup that\'s served to him.
\'\'Tomorrow, we\'re having a funeral for Washio.
It\'s important. We mourn the dead and say goodbye. It\'s a necessary ceremony for people to move on.
Goubayasi, can you give us some scripture?
M.....
Putting the empty teacup on the table, Goubayasi looked somewhat puzzled.
Gourin Yuanshu is the son of the temple. He was not a little boy at the gate, but he thought that he, along with his father and elder monks, could at least recite scripture.
It\'s true that he could recite a few sutras, but not necessarily the same as Washio\'s sect.
It\'s okay. I think form is important in these things.
This isn\'t a game, and so on.
Don\'t play games with the dead, or something like that.
There may be people who would condemn it that way. However, Ryuzaki believes that "playing funeral games" is a necessary part of the game.
We are human beings and will return to our own world someday. In order to keep such thoughts in mind, Ryuzaki makes sure that there are various forms of conduct in the class. It\'s the same with the "Otherworldly Class Meeting" and even the name of the "Jurassic Branch School". Serena and Zeku were treated as "transfer students" and given their attendance numbers with such intentions.
Now that Washio is dead, the most important thing is to send him off as a human being. The entire class must accept the death of the human Ro Rohta Washio and say goodbye to his soul. For that reason, I want to keep up appearances as much as possible.
I see.
Goubayashi crossed his arms and nodded, though he didn\'t know how much of such intentions were captured by Ryuzaki.
The most important thing in mourning for the dead is a condolence message. If my poor scripture reading can be the starting point for organizing the class\' condolences, I\'ll take it.
Thank you, Goubayasi.
How\'s the moron, by the way?
Goubayashi looks around the cafeteria and asks. Naturally, Kyousuke Soraki is not there.
\'\'That guy should have helped you after I disappeared. I want to thank him.\'\'
I\'m not a fan of morels...
Ryuzaki averted his gaze slightly.
After that, he heard a bit of talk from Gokugawara. He said that Kyousuke had gone out on deck to join the fight and tried to combine with Rin, but he couldn\'t do it. It seemed to Ryuzaki that this was due to the various incidents that had happened in quick succession, including Washio\'s death, which had taken a toll on him mentally, but he didn\'t know exactly what was going on.
He wasn\'t sure if he should let many of his classmates hear what he was about to tell them. As Ryuzaki was thinking about it for a bit, Sugiura, sensing the situation, clapped his hands with a pang, \'\'Yes, yes, yes, everyone get out of the way! He said, and paid the man off.
Sighing, Ryuzaki speaks again.
\'Goubayashi, what do you think of Utsurogi\'s character?\'
He looks a lot like you.
Goubayashi said simply.
\'The difference is, I\'m more confident in you and less confident in Utsurugi. I\'ve been looking at it that way, though.\'
For some reason, the recent Utsurogi has been making me feel really uneasy, like...
Ryuzaki says that there is a part of him that puts others first.
It\'s an uncomfortable feeling I\'ve always had for Kyousuke. Maybe I\'m paying too much attention to him, but he doesn\'t seem to have much autonomy.
There are people who have no initiative, and there are people who prioritize others too much. To me, I don\'t think the problem Utsurogi is facing is anything special.
I don\'t know.
That\'s right. Everybody suffers. We\'re all adolescents.
I didn\'t expect the word \'puberty\' to come out of Goubayashi\'s mouth. Ryuzaki erupted in a grand gush and pouted.
\'\'.......Did I say something strange?\'\'
No, no, I\'m sorry...
\'Perhaps there is a clue. Depending on the clue, the problem itself may be deep-rooted, even if it\'s not unique. It is not uncommon for people to find their problems more difficult than they need to be. Especially with the type of people like Utsurogi.
Is this guy really the same age as me? The question of whether or not they are really the same age as him dwelt in his heart once again, a question that he felt every time he spoke with Goubayash. But now, I miss even that thought.
I\'m sure you\'ll be able to find out more about this. But I don\'t want him to take on all the problems of the class anymore, as I did before. We will take the impossible step that we can all take, little by little. All we have to do is to give him a chance to do one of those impossible things.
With this, the burden that Utsurogi had been carrying will be reduced by one more.
So, if possible, I want Utsurugi to show me how well he\'s doing again. Seeing Ryuzaki looking up at the ceiling, Goubayashi laughed.
\'After all, Ryuzaki, you\'ve grown up.\'
The words were honestly pleasing as he replied, "Don\'t," he said.
Kyousuke hadn\'t left the room since then. Rin nodded disappointedly in the hallway and spread out sticky.
\'\'It\'s still no good, Himemizu.\'\'
\'Yeah...\'
A wobbly, weakly burning fireball flies to Rin. It\'s Ei.
Weakened completely by seasickness, Ei also blamed himself for the huge hole in Kyousuke\'s heart that he had noticed seven years ago and could only watch it grow, but the day had finally come for him to be hurt. The amount of frustration he felt must have been considerable.
In addition, Ei is just as shocked by Washio\'s death as he is by his own. Rin tells Ei about Washio\'s last moments. She helped Kyousuke and Rin, apologized repeatedly for her negligent apology, and left her last will and testament to Koganei before she left.
Apparently, this was a heartbreaking story for Ei, who didn\'t trust Washio\'s words and actions and dismissed it as a \'perfunctory apology\'.
I\'m sorry, Himemizu. If only I had been more firm...
No, I don\'t want to hear about it.
This matter was no one\'s fault. It\'s a problem that Kyousuke had to face at some point.
But he just doesn\'t know how to heal his heart. For Rin, it\'s frustrating.
Kyousuke has now entered a state of complete rejection of others. If we ask him to come out, he responds if we call out to him, and if we ask him to come out, he comes out. But his attitude is strangely awkward, and when he stops talking, he goes back into the room.
\'Maybe Kyousuke has lost faith in himself.
Yeah. So do I.
Ei said. Rin nodded.
Kyousuke had been thoroughly distracted from his problems until now. The fact that he had turned away meant that there was room for him to notice. Or he had noticed it in his heart. But I\'ve lived my life believing that it was for the good of others, not wanting to think that it was my own needs.
The situation that showed this to me again is the current Kyousuke.
\'Hino-kun, I wonder if Utsurogi\'s current personality is related to the fire you mentioned before?
I ask as I move away from the front of Kyousuke\'s room.
\'Maybe. That fire, the fire started in Kyousuke\'s room. It was a disposable lighter, I think.\'\'
The words didn\'t quite ring true, and Rin thought about it for a moment.
\'Does that mean Utsurogi-kun set you on fire?\'
\'I can\'t be sure because he won\'t say anything. And it was when he was a child. As a result, Kyousuke lost his parents and was the only one who survived, but we can only speculate on what effect that had on him.
\'Yeah...\'
Certainly, yes. I can only guess.
Kyousuke had a strong sense of rejection for others to lose their lives. One could connect it to the fire, but one could also think of it as a completely unrelated emotion, one that stemmed from his own kindness.
However, it may be the fact that he has tried to turn away from the seemingly commonplace emotion of \'wanting to be appreciated by others\', considering it grotesque and trying to turn away from it.
\'Well, now that I know, what are you going to do about it...\'
Rin muttered to herself.
\'Maybe this will help me understand Kyousuke, but it won\'t give me a clue as to what to do with him now.
Ei nodded.
\'I have a feeling that we\'ll need to do things differently to get Kyousuke back on his feet.
Is there another way?
\'Yeah. It\'s frustrating, but I\'m not....
Just as he was about to say that, there is a shadow that appears from the corner of the hallway with a \'nudge\'. Rin and Ei were speechless for a moment.
\'\'Oh, oh.... Goubayashi-kun, it\'s been a while!\'\'
The first person to call out to that shadow was Rin.
It was Gourin Motomune of Oga. In the midst of the Hydra battle just now, he has blitzed back and is bringing a breeze of relief to the class. I\'ve been watching the fight from the cabin, but it seemed to me that Rin was equipped with the power that would allow her to go toe-to-toe with the pawns.
Goubayashi crossed his arms and nodded, \'Mm,\' being careful not to damage the low ceiling with his horns.
\'How\'s Utsurogi doing?\'
\'Yeah, yeah.... I\'m depressed.
When Rin replied, Goubayashi only replied, \'I see. He must have heard the story from around Ryuzaki.
\'\'Hey, Goubayashi-kun,\'\'
Rin suddenly remembered something and asked Goubayashi.
\'Mm?\'
How did you end up solving your own problems, Mr. Goubayashi?
As far as the story goes, Goubayashi must have left the class to face the "demon" that lived inside him. He was probably the first and most sincere student in the class to try to confront his own problems. In doing so, he has awakened his Phase 2 abilities in the midst of the questioning and has been able to demonstrate them to their fullest extent.
Whether or not the awakening of the ability and the problems within him are really related in some way to each other, Rin does not have any solid evidence. But after facing his own problems, but letting his mind surrender in the face of them, Kyousuke was no longer able to merge with Rin. He wanted to get a hint from Goubayashi\'s words that would help Kyousuke recover.
But Goubayashi\'s answer was surprising.
\'There\'s no resolution to this,\'
What...?
I asked myself every day what I could do to get rid of the demon in my heart. But in the end, no matter how much I thought about it, I couldn\'t find an answer. If I had to choose, I\'d say there was only one answer.
Neither Rin nor Ei uttered any words at all, waiting for Goubayashi\'s next words.
\'I have no choice but to admit it. No matter how much I purify my body and sharpen my mind, I have no choice but to deal with the \'demon\' inside me.
That, he says, is the conclusion that Goubayasi reached after wandering for a month.
\'Of course, there may have been other means. But I chose this path.
\'Yeah...\'
Does that help?
I don\'t know.
Ei answered Goubayashi\'s question before Rin did.
\'It\'s hard to get Kyousuke to admit his heart now. But that\'s a measure I\'ve never tried to take before, or maybe it\'s the right thing to do.
With that, Ei finally adds, \'It\'s frustrating, though.
He makes Kyousuke admit it. My own heart. Your true feelings. Is it really possible to do that? Will Kyousuke really be able to change after admitting it? Facing his inner self is ultimately just an act of repairing the cracks in the cup.
Even if the cracks are fixed, the empty container will remain empty.
\'You can do it, Himemizu. I can\'t do it, though.
Next to Rin, who was troubled, Ei said.
\'It changes shape supplely to fit the vessel, but its essence never changes. The only thing that can fill an empty vessel is water.\'
The next day, Washio Ryota\'s funeral was held. As Ryuzaki said, the ceremony was arranged in various ways.
A makeshift Buddhist altar was prepared, and a portrait of Washio before his death was prepared by the reincarnated painter, Gahara, as a portrait of the dead man. Even so, however, the portrait captures the characteristics of Washio\'s character well, and his classmates reminisce about him in the past. Harao had even offered to provide a coffin for him, which he politely declined.
As Goubayashi read the scripture, the students who could sit on their haunches sat upright, and those who could not, quietly closed their eyes and prayed in silence.
It can be a surreal scene. But they all attended Washio\'s funeral with a serious look on their faces. Even Benii, Inugami and Harao, who is not usually very cooperative, are in attendance, closing their eyes and praying for the repose of the dead. The only thing I regretted was that I didn\'t have the body with me.
After the series of funerals were over, Goubayashi stood up and turned to everyone in the class. He moved a little so as not to turn his back on the dead.
\'Washio\'s soul will now be laid to rest. After many years, it will ascend to heaven and join the Buddha. We too will die eventually, and we will follow the same path as Washio to the afterlife. He will be our senior at that time. At best, we must live wisely and not be ashamed of ourselves.
It\'s what\'s called the Gospel. Since it involves religious talk, many students don\'t get the idea.
Goubayashi was reluctant to preach, saying, \'I\'m not a monk and I haven\'t learned enough,\' but he finally agreed to it. I understood Ryuzaki\'s words about the importance of formality, and I felt that a procedure was certainly necessary to make the shocking event of \'the death of a classmate\' easier to accept.
I had to be careful not to sound religious as much as possible.
\'Since ancient times, death has been something very familiar and commonplace. "Since ancient times, death has been a very familiar and natural phenomenon, and we, the civilized people, have been kept away from it. But death is nothing special. It is next to everyone.
There are a few students who tremble slightly as they hear these words.
The funeral ceremony is a ceremony to recognize that natural but terrible death and send the dead away. It\'s important to mourn the dead, and it\'s important to grieve for them. But we must send Washio out to die. Sparing his life unnecessarily keeps his soul in this world. And that\'s not good for Washio either.
As he says it, Gowbayashi once again realizes that \'funeral\' is a ceremony for the living, not the dead.
Washio is dead. The dead do not speak. Because they don\'t talk about it, the bereaved think about many things. They forget that Washio is dead, and they come to think that it is dishonest to laugh and be frightened. But it is necessary for the living to stay alive.
The dead do not speak. They think nothing. They don\'t resent the living, and they don\'t blame them for their dishonesty. We believe that such rational thoughts are wrapped up in human feelings and \'forgotten\' for the sake of the dead. It is a ritual for that purpose.
Washio was a smartass. When we stopped talking about him, you might think, \'No way. But people also gradually stop talking about the living. They don\'t go out of their way to talk about a friend they haven\'t seen in 10 years, but they still remember from time to time. Still, we will remember them from time to time, and if we see them again, we will talk to them. That\'s fine. The day will come when I will meet Washio again. That may be sixty or seventy years from now, or even beyond Nayuta, but that\'s just the way it is.
The deck, which had been turned into a funeral hall, was silent.
"That\'s all from me. Ryuzaki.
Yeah.
When Goubayashi called out to him, Ryuzaki bowed to Washio\'s Buddhist altar and then turned back to his classmates, standing in the same position as Goubayashi.
\'After this, we\'ll go to the cafeteria for lunch. But first, one thing from me. It\'s about Koganei.
There was a slight tension between the classmates.
This is because mentioning Koganei Yoshiki\'s name was treated like a taboo after Washio\'s death. From the enemy\'s words, it was clear that Koganei was on the enemy\'s side. Even though it was unavoidable, now that Washio was dead, an air of unacceptability was suddenly being created for him.
\'I\'ve heard Washio\'s last words from Rin. The words she wants Koganei to hear are \'I don\'t care\'. I\'m sure everyone has mixed feelings about it, and it will take some time to accept, but I want to take Washio\'s dying wish into account.
There was no word about it from the class. Ryuzaki sighed.
\'\'Well, that\'s all. Then I\'ll move to the cafeteria from now on...
Ryuzaki,
As if to interrupt his words, there was a student in the class who raised his hand tensely. Because it was so unexpected student, Ryuzaki rolled his eyes.
\'\'........Asuka?\'\'
It\'s the class queen, the vampire Asuka Benii, the vampire. The usual lazy coloration on Benii\'s face has disappeared.
\'\'I also have something I want to say to you all. Okay?