学校成绩差当公共坐便器

Chapter 303

We ran back to the warehouse to find that Officers Xun and Luo had committed suicide, their bodies sprawled on the ground. Deputy Director Zheng struggled desperately as he shouted, "Don’t stop me! Let me kill myself!"

As it turned out, they feigned their deaths in accordance with our plan, smoothly executing it, even making sure not to all die at the same time lest it raise any suspicions. The oblivious officers were scared out of their wits so I said I would take a look.

I pretended to conduct an external autopsy and caught Officer Xun’s playful wink while I was examining the bodies. “Did I give a convincing performance?" he asked.

"Shut up, you’re a dead man!" I warned.

After the “autopsy,” I stood up and shook my head, pretending to be devastated. "Watch Director-General Cheng,” I instructed. “Don’t let him do anything impulsive."

I personally guarded the body till the police vehicle arrived for fear that others would notice a flaw. When placing their bodies into the body bags, I deliberately left a hole for airflow.

"I don’t understand,” said Zhang Jiulin. “Why were they the only ones who were affected?"

"I suggested they play dead,” I explained, keeping my voice low. “If they don’t die, the murderer won’t stop. Make sure you keep this to yourself!"

Zhang Jiulin looked at me in surprise, "You have quite a few tricks, don’t you?"

We took the police car back to the station. On our way there, I phoned Dali and asked him to buy and bring over a few hoodies in size L.

"Dude, Pockmark Li hung up on me,” he complained. “Is he really Pockmark Li?"

"Who cares about Pockmark Li?” I scoffed. “I have Zhang Jiulin with me. Wait at the entrance of the city bureau to meet your idol!"

Zhang Jiulin cast a suspicious look at me. "Jiu-ge, I have a small request,” I said. “A friend of mine admires you very much. Please take a picture with him later, won’t you?"

"Sure,” he nodded. “But I also have a small request as well. My little spirit pet says that your blood smells delicious. Last night, it made a huge fuss and insisted on drinking some. Could you give me a little of your blood?"

“Spirit pet? Where is it?” I looked around despite knowing perfectly well where it was.

I placed my hands on his chest as he asked, and a slight bulge appeared under his clothes. Suddenly, I felt sharp teeth bite my finger, the stinging sensation so painful I issued a muffled groan.

In the front seat, Xiaotao turned around and caught a glimpse of my ambiguous actions. "Sigh, just a while ago you two were arguing. But now you’re all lovey-dovey!" she teased.

I sat there limply, forced to “donate” 150cc of my blood. When I withdrew my hand, I noticed a pair of crescent-shaped small eyes peeking from under his arms. "Thank you for the blood,” came a little girl’s voice. “It’s so delicious I wish I could drink it every day!"

Zhang Jiulin patted his clothes and playfully chided, "You insatiable little fox!"

Although I knew the gist of its abilities, seeing the spirit pet with my own eyes was another matter. I wished I could raise a spirit pet as well, but the idea of having to feed it my blood nipped the thought in the bud.

When we arrived at the city bureau, Dali was standing at the door, eagerly waiting for Zhang Jiulin’s arrival. At the sight of the man alighting the vehicle, his eyes gleamed with excitement as he rushed over, exclaiming, "Holy smokes! Are you really Zhang Jiulin?"

In the face of such an enthusiastic fan, Zhang Jiulin’s discomfort was apparent but he still politely answered all of Dali’s questions.

"Do they know each other?" wondered Xiaotao.

"It’s a long story,” I chuckled. “Just think of them as a fan and his idol."

After Zhang Jiulin finally got rid of Dali’s relentless hounding, he followed us to the morgue. "Xiao Song Yang, aren’t you afraid of corpses?" he asked.

"What’s there to be afraid about? The dead are more honest and reliable than the living!" I declared.

"With your extraordinary courage and abundant Yang energy, you’re a good prospect for a Yin object merchant,” remarked Zhang Jiulin. “Would you consider switching professions? You can make a lot more money than you do as a coroner."

"Thank you,” I said. “But if my dead grandfather knew, he’d be cursing at me in his grave."

I turned to Xiaotao who flickered a lauding look in my direction. Noticing our little exchange, Zhang Jiulin laughed cheekily, "As I see it, your heart’s set on something else entirely!"

The other bodies had been sent directly to the funeral home so only Officers Xun and Luo’s “bodies” remained in the morgue. After they changed out of their clothes, I suggested they leave quietly through the back entrance and reminded them not to act alone for the time being. But in such a situation, where was the safest place? What if the murderer managed to see through our plan and intercepted them on their journey?

Understanding my concerns, Zhang Jiulin offered, "I’ll ask Pockmark Li to look after them and teach them the Tao Te Ching."

“That’s perfect, thank you!"

Zhang Jiulin phoned Pockmark Li and told the two officers to head to one of the hotels to look for a handsome middle-aged man who resembled Wu Xiubo and had Chen Daoming’s temperament.

“Just look for a vulgar looking man with pockmarks all over his face,” I added.

The other matter I needed Zhang Jiulin’s help with was to teach the rest of the officers the Tao Te Ching.

We found an empty conference room and gathered all the members of the task force there. Those whose lives had been saved by Zhang Jiulin had confidence in his methods but the others remained skeptical, certain it was all hogwash, remnants of feudal superstition. Back when I used the Triple Divination Technique, I received the same reactions from the police. And now, they spat snarky remark after another, asking where we found this Jianghu “master” and poked mullock at our absurd beliefs.

"It’s your life,” said Zhang Jiulin. “Do whatever the hell you want!"

Some of the younger, more arrogant officers were ready to leave the room but I stood up and interjected, "Please calm down and listen to me. The fact that the Tao Te Ching is able resist the effects of the music is based on science."

The attention of the room was now focused on me. First off, I explained that the incantations had a positive effect on the psyche, but most importantly, the principle of resonance was the basis of its resistance against the suicidal effect. For example, when the word "Tao" was pronounced, the back of the tongue moved in an upward motion and the lungs vibrated at a certain frequency. The pronunciation of the word "name” produced resonance in the oral cavity and throat, while the word "mother" produced resonance deep within the abdominal cavity. The entire mantra brought about the circulation of resonance throughout the internal organs and the airflow impacted the abdomen, thus protecting the internal organs and preventing the demonic tune from extending its influence.

Why were singers and vocalists healthier, and why did monks and Taoists priests seldom fall ill?

It was precisely because singing and chanting could exercise the internal organs and regulate breathing. And how was this related to Taoism? To put it bluntly, chanting with deep voices emitted from the chest cavity was in fact similar to modern day vocal practice.

"If that’s the case, can’t we just sing?" quipped an officer.

"No,” I shook my head. “The mantra was carefully created by our ancestors. Every word is exquisite and serves its purpose in circulating resonance throughout each organ which can’t be done by any ordinary songs. Besides, it’s easy to be distracted if everyone sings a different tune when the demonic music starts playing. On the other hand, chanting together can allow for concentration and eliminate distractions. After all, the human spirit has unlimited strength."

After listening to my explanation, the officers were more or less convinced, their cynicism swept away.

"You’re great at making nonsense sound perfectly logical!" laughed Xiaotao.

"You’re mistaken. I’ve actually read this in a book,” I said. “And after what we’ve just been through..."

Zhang Jiulin quietly gave me a thumbs up. After he had imparted the Tao Te Ching to the officers, he turned to me, "Xiao Song Yang, you’re much better than I am at dealing with these policemen. I’ve read the Tao Te Ching all my life but I’ve never considered its principles. Well, you’ve given me a new understanding of it today. You’ve really impressed me!"

"I’m flattered!" I chuckled.