Chapter 137 It Hurts
He walked down the hallways, wondering which room she was in. It was a full moon tonight so there was enough moonlight seeping through the windows to guide him a pale path down the corridors. After a few minutes of walking, he finally came across a door with a golden plate that had her name on it.
He pushed the door open, locking it behind him. His footsteps were very quiet, so much that it didn’t create a single noise, so when he heard a cry, he stiffened. His head snapped to the right where there was a bed with muslin curtains hanging down from the top.
"No...I’m sorry..."
Yang Feng felt as if his heart was being ripped into pieces. Her soft cries, the sniffles, everything was like a merciless jab to his heart. He rubbed his chest in hopes of soothing the shooting pain. He walked towards the bed and lifted the curtains, his heart breaking on the spot when he saw her state.
Her eyes were squeezed shut, her dark, silky hair cascading around her. His eyes trailed to her softly parted lips, the enticing color drawing him closer.
She was clenching the white blanket so tightly, her delicate fingers were ghostly pale, nearly blending into her blanket. There were droplets of cold sweat on her forehead, causing her fringe to stick to it. Tears were continuously rolling down her cheeks silently accompanied by intermittent soft cries and sobs.
"Oh, love..." He hoarsely whispered upon seeing her state, immediately wiping her tears away.
He stiffened when she suddenly cried out. "NO! Don’t touch me!" She shrieked in her sleep, her words alarming him. Hearing those words, the temperature around them turned into a murderous chill.
Yang Feng’s eyes became darker than night, the color resembling an endless abyss. Who was touching her? Which bastard dared to cause her to have nightmares like this?!
"Please..." She wept, her voice so broken, it instantly beckoned him towards her like a moth attracted to a flame. He saw she was still asleep, but her grip on the blanket had further tightened. More tears poured from her eyes, like an endless waterfall.
Yang Feng felt as if his heart was being continuously shredded. Quickly, but gently, he pulled her into his warm embrace, prying the blanket out of her fingers. The minute he succeeded, she roughly grabbed his fingers instead.
"Stop it! It hurts!" She wailed, struggling in his arms, clearly not understanding reality. Her dreams were mocked by the sound of clothes being ripped and a frantically struggling woman.
"Shh, shh...It’s alright." He gently comforted her, pressing her head to his shoulders, gently pulling his finger out of her tiny hand. Quickly, it seized onto something else — his white shirt. He ignored the fact that she was bunching up the expensive silk worth thousands. If it comforted her to hold something, he’d rather have it be him.
"It hurts! Make it stop, it hurts!" She sobbed, each word painfully slicing his heart. He didn’t know what nightmare she was experiencing, but he could only hope it would quickly pass.
"It’ll stop soon, don’t think about it..." He continued to mummer reassuring words into her ears, gently cuddling her in his arms, continuously rubbing his calloused hands gently up and down her back, as he soothingly patted the back of her head.
"It’s going to be alright soon." He whispered, continuing to console her. Occasionally, he would press kisses upon her head, his lips lingering there while he beckoned her with comforting phrases.
Soon, she stopped struggling in his arms and instead snuggled into it. He gently wiped her tears away, handling her with care. He leaned his head on top of hers, continuing to soothe her. When he saw that she had calmed down, he still held her for god knows how long.
He didn’t know why he came here, but his legs just brought him here. A tiny part of him knew it was because he couldn’t sleep properly without knowing whether or not she was safe. Even if she was in her grandfather’s house, he still worried about her health. After seeing her previous state, he decided it was a good thing to have come here.
She mumbled something in her sleep that he couldn’t properly understand. He pulled back a bit to listen to what she was saying, but the hand scrunching his silk button-up gripped tighter and roughly yanked him back to her, continuing to rest her head right below his shoulder. He stared at her in astonishment before a smile slowly spread on his lips.
"...Fe...ng..." She mumbled in her sleep.
Startled at her word, he looked at her and saw her eyes were still shut, but her eyebrows were now pulled together, and her lips were tugged downwards. He anxiously waited to hear what she would say about him.
"I...I..." She grumbled some gibberish, suddenly the arm wrapped around his shoulders tightened. Yang Feng sighed at the anticlimactic ending as she went on to say something else that was completely unintelligible. He raised his hand to smooth out the lines between her forehead but paused when she spoke up again.
"...you..." He frowned, not catching the first part of her speech.
"You’re a tease, even in your sleep." He quietly said, adjusting the blankets and then gently placing her back onto the bed. He had a hard time getting her to properly lay down because of the arm that was tightly holding onto his shoulder for dear life.
It took every ounce of his patience and self-control not to throw his logic out the window and just climb into the bed with her. He knew it was already violating their trust by coming to her room unannounced and he didn’t want to cross the line further.
"I’m sorry." He whispered to her, apologizing for what he did to her previously and also for forcibly prying her arm away from him.
She kicked her blanket in her sleep. He chuckled at her behavior, pressing butterfly kisses on her dainty fingers, desperately wishing it was her lips instead. But he didn’t dare to do so, in fear that she would wake up. He gently placed her arms into the blankets before expertly tucking her in, ensuring every part of her was secured and tightly wrapped in it.
He sat up straighter, ready to leave, but paused when he looked at her face. He hesitated to leave. Bending down, he pressed a final kiss on her forehead, his lips lingering there for a few seconds before reluctantly pulling away.
Using his thumb, he caressed her cheeks. They were as soft and smooth as he last remembered. With one last kiss on her nose, he stood up to leave.
Zhao Lifei woke up the second he forcibly detached her arm from around him. Without warning, she climbed out of the bed, her feet making tiny patters on the cold marble ground and before Yang Feng could even react or turn around, she had wrapped her arms around his waist, taking him by surprise.
"Don’t go." She whispered, holding onto him tightly, burying her face into the back of his perfectly ironed suit. She was terrified he would push her away or leave her as he had done before. "Please." She felt her fingers nervously shake.
Yang Feng was awfully quiet for a while. His silence scared her and she could do nothing else but hug him tighter, pressing her entire body into his back, to the point where she could feel the muscles of his back contracting.
"Can we talk it out?" She added on, her voice barely above a whisper. The longer he stayed quiet, the more her fear of him leaving wrapped around her. Unknowingly, her walls were beginning to crumble until her heart was fully exposed to him. If he pushed her away now, her entire world would crumble into nothingness.