BXBX NOVEL Chapter 387 - Broken Minds
~~~(Location: Personal Bedroom, Greshina)~~~
~~~(Time: 9:40 PM)~~~
The party was a success, as it always is... Lying to her isn\'t what I want to do, but she\'s gone mad. The Oryzox family will have to forgive me for my lies. There isn\'t anything I can do to bring some reality to what she\'s planning. Queen Oryzox is undergoing to commit a terrible act against her own people. More than 40 percent of the elven population are half-bloods.
My worries and duties are blurring together now, and I hoped that this wouldn\'t ever happen. There are things that need to be done. To undo what she\'s set in motion. "When I do decide to die, one day... I want it to be when The Elven Kingdom is fixed..." The only one I have to talk to is the person staring back at me in the mirror.
Pure-blooded elves have a form of immortality. They live forever and stop physically aging when they wish, but we can still be killed. As a pure-blood, I have these qualities, and it\'s been my duty ever since the first Oryzox was crowned that I\'m ordered to kill the elven ruler if they descend too far into madness. A curse plagues our throne.
Not a literal one, but a metaphorical one. I\'ve killed every elven ruler since the first day I was given my job as the royal family\'s butler. Given to me by the first king of The Elven Kingdom. "You know what you must do if she doesn\'t change, and you must try the cycle over again. Hope that Olisandra is a better fit." In a sense, I\'m losing sanity myself. Talking to the reflecting in the mirror.
The burden of my responsibilities will never end, forced to live an eternal life. There have been countless times I wished to die, to finally have release from life. I don\'t even know how old I am anymore... "Look at you, you old man... Talking to yourself in the mirror... Maybe it\'s you that needs to be put down..." Moments of madness are becoming more frequent.
Olisandra and Blezikel are the last hope I have anymore... If I\'m to kill their mother, Olisandra will take the throne, and if she doesn\'t, Blezikel will. I fear that their mother\'s insanity has infected them in some way, but that doesn\'t mean I can fix them. "Playing God now? I knew that you\'d lost your marbles, but this? Talk about scary." The reflection speaks to me, not in my own words.
I throw my fist forward, and the glass shatters and sprays in every direction. "I\'m losing my own grip on reality... There isn\'t much time until I lose my mind completely... Too much time has poisoned my mind, and immortality, my soul..." Elves that live for a very long time either lose their minds or have their memories wiped after a certain number of years.
In all the thousands of years I\'ve been alive, I haven\'t wiped my memories once. When a memory wipe occurs, you remember that you had your memory wiped, and you keep your most precious memories. Not me. It\'s all still there, everything I\'ve experienced and all the terrible things I\'ve done. Do I have a weak will? Or is it a strong one... I don\'t know anymore.
~~~(POV: Cera Adamo)~~~
~~~(Location: Camping near The Road to The Capital, Elven Kingdom)~~~
~~~(Time: 10:30 PM)~~~
We\'ll be arriving at the gates of Greshina by tomorrow afternoon, and tonight is our final night on the road. We\'ve set up camp nearby, and I\'m sitting by the fire, almost alone. Hailey is with me, and everyone else is in their tents. Hailey hasn\'t spoken much since I told her the truth... She\'s had a faraway look in her eyes, and bags are forming from lack of sleep.
She knows that I won\'t bug her, and that\'s because the Adamo\'s deal with problems in their own ways. Hailey and I are the same in that we dive into our heads, the difference being I usually come out of it stronger. She needs help getting out when she does it. "Am I evil, Cera?" My head lifts, and I look at her. Unsurprised by her words. I figured she\'d think something like this.
Evil can come in many forms, and sometimes it\'s hard to distinguish what\'s truly evil and what isn\'t. You can know between good and evil, but evil is smart, and it can disguise itself as good. Which makes it hard to distinguish sometimes... "Do you think you\'re evil, Hailey? You know what\'s in your heart more than I do. What\'s in your head." She cringes at my words, and she buries her face in her knees.
I never believed Hailey became what she became until I saw it for myself in my first life. I didn\'t believe she was capable of succumbing to that life. That\'s why I say she\'d know more than me now. I didn\'t know then, and I don\'t know now. I\'ve saved her from that future, but that doesn\'t mean that which drove her to that life isn\'t still in her...
My eyes turn from Hailey, and I look back into the fire. I never got to speak to the Hailey that was in my old life... Not after what she became... There were things that I wish I could\'ve said to her... But I never got a chance to... Maybe now is a good time... "I hated you... Not the Hailey that you are now, but the one that you became..." My honesty is twofold, and she curls up a bit harder at my words.
Hailey needs to hear this, and I need to say it. For my own sake of peace. "That didn\'t mean you weren\'t my sister... I still loved you even though I hated you... Even after mom died... I\'m sorry I couldn\'t save you, Hailey... You were my sister, and I couldn\'t save you..." There is no hope in holding back the tears I\'ve saved for this moment. One I never thought I\'d have...
She lifts her head at the choking of my own voice, and she sees the tears falling from my eyes and running down my face. Her tears are the same as mine, and she stands up and moves over to sit next to me. Wrapping her arms around me. "I\'m so sorry, Cera... I\'m so sorry... Please, forgive me..." She chokes and hiccups between her words.
Her tears are soaking my shoulder pad, but I don\'t care. There are few moments that I get to cry in my life, and I\'m fine sharing tears with my sister. I was always taught never to show weakness, that showing weakness would get me killed... I\'ve never cried in front of someone like this... Everything I\'ve kept buried has broken me, and I don\'t think those cracks in my mind will ever heal.
~~~(POV: Hailey Adamo)~~
~~~(Location: Camp near The Road to The Capital, Elven Kingdom)~~~
~~~(Time: 10:42 PM)~~~
My poor little brother... Living with all this pain... "I\'m sorry that I\'m such a terrible sister... That I tore our family apart..." It eats me alive knowing what I did... Hearing what I caused from Cera... Learning the truth... Cera keeps his head low, and his white elven hair hangs over his face. I see tears falling on the dirt below his face.
Even now, he\'s trying to hide his pain... All I can do is hug him harder, and try to support him. "I\'m sorry that I\'m a terrible brother, Hailey... In the end, I damned billions to fix my mistakes... There isn\'t a place in Hell or the Underworld for a monster like me..." It hurts to hear him say those things about himself, and I can\'t find the words to speak...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: Below this line, I\'ll be keeping Cera\'s player information. That way, I won\'t have to place it into the story above anymore. It takes about 180 words up.
[Slayer (Zern) Lvl.196]
[Exp: 40/100%]
[Title: The Son of Arch-Angel Michael (Hidden)]
[Stats] [Strength - 7095][Endurance - 7045][Dexterity - 7215][Speed - 8240][Focus - 19,660]
[Mana aura control: 6/100%]
[Health: 76,560,000,000/76,560,000,000] [Mana: 216,600,000,000/216,600,000,000]
[Stat Points: 50] [Armor rating: 500]
[Inventory] [Dice of Wayland (Divine)] [Hardened Tree sap Armor (Very Rare)] [The Witness (Legendary Sword)] [Fenrir\'s Whistle (Divine)] [Sally\'s Dresses 5x] [Camping gear] [Food Rations 3x] [Dried meat 3x] [Fishing poles 2x] [Fish 8x] [Festival Garbs 2x]
[Passive Perks]
[Inheritor of the Sword] [Son of Heaven] [Slayer of Evil] [Holy Willow Trees Savior] [Finder of Legends] [The Divine who has Legend] [Destined for Greatness] [Dungeon Diver] [An Overachiever]
[Active Skills]
[Heavens light Lvl.59 325/5900] [Protected by Heaven Lvl.59 225/5900] [Slash Lvl..77 4600/130000] [Parry Lvl.53 80/5300] [Double Strike N/A] [Kingslayer N/A] [Raging Machine N/A] [Winged Glory] [Angelic Flight] [Divine Pressure Exertion] [Divinity Pulse] [Controled Fun]