BXBX NOVEL Chapter 320 A Mother's Lullaby II
<strong>[ WARNING: THE FOLLOWING NARRATIVE CONTAINS DISTURBING, TRIGGERING, AND SENSITIVE CONTENT. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. ]</strong>
Aries knew Joaquin would never kill her. If her death was what he wanted to begin with, he would\'ve killed her along with everyone in the land of Rikhill. But he kept her and made her life a living hell while he enjoyed every second of her misery.
After the news of her pregnancy was made known to her, Aries was left with zero hope. She went on a hunger strike, but she was forced to eat since Joaquin wanted to keep the child. Not because he loved the life within her, but because he knew birthing his child was the last thing she wanted.
They kept away all the sharp objects and everything she could use to harm herself. In the end, Aries was locked in an almost empty room with woods sealing the windows. It was just her and the child in her womb. It had been two months since and her tummy was showing.
Aries sat on the bed in the middle of the night, eyes down. It was another soundless night, yet the silence was echoing in her ear like thunder. She couldn\'t sleep since she had been sleeping most of the time — maybe because of crying or because of her pregnancy.
"I hate you," she whispered, planting her hand on her protruding tummy. "I hope you die now… there\'s no hope of living in this world, I\'m telling you. The last thing you want is having me as your mother and having him as your father. You\'ll get destroyed even before you bloom."
Her eyes stung as they filled with tears of hatred, grinding her teeth as her breathing suspended. Until now, she couldn\'t accept this life and she hated it even before it could develop inside her womb.
"Just die," she added under her breath, hoping this life would hear her and know it wasn\'t welcomed. "Just die, alright? Die… that\'s the only way to save yourself because I will never want you, nor will I love you."
She loathed it.
"Just… die…" she continued through her gritted teeth, raising her eyes. She looked around at the dimly lit room where the fireplace was the only source of light in the room.
"Right… you\'re his child. So you will persist even if I go on a hunger strike and even if I pound on my stomach. You\'ll hold on to me… just like how that insufferable monster does." She crawled out of the bed, dragging her feet towards the fireplace.
The longer she stayed in this room with this life growing within her, the more desperate she was to get rid of it. There was no other reason. She just wanted to get rid of it because she loathed the child\'s father.
Standing in front of the fireplace, she stared at the burning woods in silence. In her mind, if she gets that burning wood and struck herself, it\'ll be the end of her… and this child.
The side of her lips curled up with the thought. She wanted to survive because she had people to avenge; her life was not just hers. However, she couldn\'t bear to see this child coming into this terrible world and having her as the mother and Joaquin as the father.
She didn\'t want any connection with Joaquin other than being the murderer of her family. Having a child with him was the last straw.
Without a second hesitation about whether her hand would get burned, Aries simply outstretched her hand to grab the burning wood. But the second she did, she hissed and retracted it almost immediately. It was more painful than she thought, but she clenched her teeth tighter and quickly grabbed the burning wood as fast as she could.
"Ah…!" she hissed in pain while the burning wood rolled over to the side. Aries blew on her hand to ease the scorching pain and then glanced at the burning wood. Seeing that the fire was slowly devouring the carpet, she hurriedly rushed to the bed and grabbed the sheet, which she used to put out the fire before it spread. Only when the fire died and the pungent burnt scent wafted her nose, did she realize she should\'ve just let herself get burned alive.
"Haha…!" she laughed maniacally at the thought. "That would be better, I guess… I\'ll kill more people in that case."
Aries shook her head mildly as she gazed at the fireplace. Her hand felt like it was on fire and putting pressure on it ironically soothed it a little.
"Should I just burn this place…?" she wondered and glanced at her left hand, but changed her mind. She knew herself and people might barge inside before the fire could get to her. So Aries simply slumped next to the burnt wood and looked at it for minutes.
When she picked it up, dark coal smeared on her hand and it scalded her to the touch. But she held on to it. Her hand already felt it was still on fire, so hurting it more wouldn\'t hurt as much. It was a crazy argument, but she held onto it until she got numbed and used to the heat.
The wood, although it grew thin because of the fire, was large enough to strike herself and kill her. She graced the blunt, pointed tip of the wood, and smiled.
"This is enough…" she whispered as her eyelids drooped until they were partially closed. "… if I use enough strength, it can kill the both of us. I wonder what kind of face he will make if he sees me drowning in my own pool of blood?"
A giggle escaped her mouth with the thought before she held on to the burnt wood with both her hands. She stretched her arm away, the slightly sharp tip aimed at her stomach. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, mustering her courage to strike herself and end this misery once and for all.
This was the only time she could do this, and Aries knew that. If someone came in here and saw this mess, they would empty this chamber with only a bed for her.
"So long…" she whispered and gritted her teeth, swinging her hand down straight to her tummy. However, before the wood could touch her tummy, Aries stopped, hearing the lullaby she would use to sing with Alaric, her little sister.